by R. Herbert | Nov 30, 2014 | Positive Living, Strategic Articles
A wise man once said that the first things we do in life are to map our world and to want what we don’t have.
But do those things bring us happiness when we get them? In this season of frantic holiday buying and wanting, many find no real happiness in getting.
But human beings were clearly made to want things – with desires that are not satisfied by “things.” Our article “What Do You Want?“, uploaded today, looks at the story of human wanting and at some of the things that we can want that do bring happiness to ourselves and others. Read the article here.
by R. Herbert | Nov 3, 2014 | Positive Living
“Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness” is one of the most well-known phrases in the United States Declaration of Independence. It ranks the pursuit of happiness as an “unalienable right” which the Declaration affirms has been given to all human beings by their Creator.
The goal of human happiness is, of course, a totally worthy one with which few would disagree, but the words “pursuit of Happiness” can sometimes cause a misunderstanding. All too often we tend to think of happiness as a goal to be pursued, a thing to be chased, caught up with and captured; but there can be problems with this idea of pursuing happiness.
If we pursue happiness as a goal in itself, we never really find it. We have a whole book of the Bible – the Book of Ecclesiastes – reminding us of that truth. This is because happiness is not a commodity to be hunted and caught; it comes as a side-effect of what we do. We have only to read widely in literature to see that this has been something that wise men and women have understood for millennia – that rather than being an independent commodity we somehow gain, happiness is something we produce by what we do. Solomon found this (Ecclesiastes 2:24-26), and consider these few modern examples: Eleanor Roosevelt wrote “Happiness is not a goal; it is a by-product.” That is what Ralph Waldo Emerson meant when he wrote “Some pursue happiness – others create it.” And the current Dalai Lama has said: “Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.”
But if that was all there is to happiness, everyone would do things that made them happy and everyone would be happy – which we know is far from the truth. Unfortunately, many people short-circuit the production of happiness in a particular way. Writer Freya Stark summarized this: “There can be no happiness if the things we believe in are different from the things we do.” And remember that Jesus himself said, as he concluded the teaching of his disciples: “If you know these things, happy are you if you do them” (John 13:17 KJV).
There is an undeniable link between what we know and what we do. No matter what we do to try to produce happiness in our lives, our attempts will always be short-circuited if there is a gap between belief and practice, between our faith and our actions. Sometimes a little meditation on that fact is a far more effective way to get back to producing happiness in our lives than trying to chase happiness by seeking it some other way.
But a major lesson that we humans have learned through history is that we become happy as a result of what we do. So what particular actions make us happy? Once again we can look to Ecclesiastes to see that satisfying our every whim certainly does not produce happiness, and that chasing happiness is a “chasing after the wind” (Ecclesiastes 2:11). But if we look again to the words of Christ “If you know these things, happy are you if you do them,” it is clear that “these things” are the things Jesus had taught his disciples – foremost of which are the principles of giving and serving. It is in this context that we should also remember Jesus’ words that “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35). It is no coincidence that the Greek word makarion – “blessed” also means “happy.” If we are doing these things we won’t have to pursue happiness because, invariably, happiness will come to us.
by R. Herbert | Oct 26, 2014 | Positive Living, Relationships
“When I smiled at them, they scarcely believed it; the light of my face was precious to them” (Job 29:24).
You probably know that studies have found that smiling is good for you. Carefully controlled psychological experiments have proven that we are happy because we smile just as much as we smile because we are happy. Smiling – even forced smiling – has been found to relieve stress, and a 2010 study published in Psychological Science even showed that smile intensity in photographs predicted longevity.
But did you know that at least one study has found that the single most effective thing a person can usually do to enhance his or her relationships with other people is … to smile more often? So in the title to this post I do not mean to be flippant in paraphrasing the biblical injunction “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven” (Matthew 5:16, KJV). Letting our “light” shine is clearly more than just smiling, it involves our “good works” – the whole range of our behavior and interactions with others – yet if smiling is such an important component of our relationships with others, shouldn’t we indeed smile more often?
We may not be able to find biblical verses saying “Jesus smiled,” but in his classic work The Humor of Christ, Elton Trueblood lists thirty passages showing the humor of Jesus in the Synoptic Gospels. There are many other examples in the Bible of things being said with evident humor that suggest smiles were often present on the faces of God’s servants (for example, 1 Kings 18:27); and verses like “Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy” (Psalm 126:2) had to involve smiling.
The point is, walking in God’s ways should produce smiles at least a portion of the time. This is particularly true because feelings of care and affection are frequently accompanied by smiles – if we are concerned and caring for others we will naturally smile even, sometimes, despite our own circumstances. In fact, just as experiments have found we can make ourselves happy by smiling, we can also make others happy by smiling at them. So there are at least two good reasons to be smiling, but it is something many Christians don’t do as often as we might expect. A surprising number of sincere believers live under a cloud of seriousness – at its worst it can be an expression of focusing on spiritual problems rather than the answers, though more often it’s just that we forget what an impact a smile can have.
So keep this in mind when you greet the world. As they say, if you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours. It’s not meant as pop-psychology advice to make you feel better, it’s meant as a small reminder that smiling is a part of letting our light shine. It certainly isn’t the most important part, but it may be the first thing that people notice about us and – as Job mentions in the scripture quoted above – it may be one of the things they firmly remember.
by R. Herbert | Jun 22, 2014 | Positive Living
Being under the power of sail (whether sailboat, sailboard, iceboat or whatever) can be a lot of fun, but, just like life itself, it can have both exhilarating and difficult times.
When we have a “following wind” and the going seems effortless – the wind moving us along almost without work, just like those “good days” in life – things seem good indeed. On the other hand, when we have to fight into the wind – like those other days we all experience – it’s not so easy. But it still works. If you have ever been sailing, you know that we can make progress sailing into the wind just as we can with the wind behind us.
Sailing into a wind, of course, we have to tack the boat – zigzagging back and forth in a way that never seems like we are going in the right direction, yet we get where we are going eventually. In the Christian life, God takes us on many tacks; although we may often not see where we are going, or understand the point of some of the detours we might seem to have to take, He sets the course and gets us to our destination (Philippians 1:6). An encouraging fact about tacking is that no matter whether we make small zigzags (to put it in non-nautical language) or large ones, the actual distance travelled is actually the same; and we still get where we are going. Sometimes life’s detours can seem to be long ones, but if we have turned over the helm of our life to the One who is the sure Pilot we will get there.
Nevertheless, those times when we are facing the wind or going through stormy waters may seem tough, and we may wish for calm seas, but that’s actually what all sailors fear most when under sail – being becalmed. Throughout the history of sail when winds dropped and movement stopped, sailors eventually ran out of food and water and became extremely sick or sometimes perished. When we enter what may seem to be a pleasant, calm stretch of life, we need to remember that being becalmed often leads to a false sense of security, to apathy and eventual loss of close contact with the One who is the bread and the water of life (John 6:35, John 4:14).
We may think sometimes that living under our own control – like ships with engines that do not have to rely on external power – would be great in that we could go anywhere: picking our own directions, making our own moves; but left to our own direction in life we know we really drift aimlessly and no direction has any meaning. When we are relying on the power of the wind we work with a power beyond our control, and that is how God chooses to propel us in His direction. Once we understand it, we see that the Christian life, like sailing, is not really giving up our freedom of direction; it’s accepting a freedom to participate in the most challenging, exhilarating and meaningful sailing possible. It reminds me of the lyrics of the old song made famous by Rod Stewart: “I am Sailing,” which ends:
“We are sailing, we are sailing,
home again ‘cross the sea.
We are sailing stormy waters,
to be near you, to be free.
Oh Lord, to be near you, to be free …”
by R. Herbert | Apr 30, 2014 | Positive Living
If concern about specific aspects of your future, or the future in general, affects you, there are two statistics you might want to keep in mind.
The First Statistic: How we see the future is so often a measure of important aspects of who we are – particularly, one would think, a measure of our religious faith or lack thereof. We would expect people of faith to have less fear of the future – despite medical, economic or social problems. However, a recent Barna Group survey conducted in the United States revealed an interesting fact: while 77% of Americans in general were found to be concerned about what the future holds, 82% of Protestant Christians expressed concern for the future. (You can view the Barna infographic with these statistics
here.)
While it may be that some Christians felt concern regarding possible “End Time” scenarios shaping up in the world around them, it seems paradoxical that those of religious faith should fear the future more than the average person in society. This is perhaps especially true for Christians when we consider the words of Jesus: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear” (Matthew 6:25). Jesus went on to give the parable of the birds of the air and the flowers of the field that do not worry about the future, but are provided for, and said that we should not worry about anything: “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself” (Matthew 6:24).
The Second Statistic: These words of Jesus recorded in Matthew 6 are not just a positive parable in isolation. The Barna survey results are surprising considering another statistic – a biblical one – that we should consider seriously if we feel apprehensive about the future. The most frequently repeated command in the Bible is: “Do not fear” or “Do not be afraid.” When we read each instance of these many scriptures telling us not to fear, we find that they cover almost every aspect of life and its fears – economic, social, and physical safety and well being.
It is important that we as Christians remember this fact. The Son of God experienced life just as we do and experienced the same causes of concern and apprehension. Perhaps precisely because of this, and the fact that He clearly overcame the temptation to fear, He urges His disciples continually to do likewise and to refuse to fear the future. If fear and apprehension about tomorrow are concerns with which you wrestle, see one of our most popular articles: “
Facing the Future Without Fear” for practical advice. Decide now that if the first statistic given in this article applies to you, with God’s help you will make the second statistic apply to you, also.
by R. Herbert | Mar 27, 2014 | Positive Living
There is an old story, I am not aware of its origin, that each day as we go into the world we pass through one of three doors. The first door is the dark way, the door of evil intentions, which leads to harm for ourselves and others. The second door leads to neither good nor bad intentions, and the third door leads to the good intentions of serving and helping others. The interesting thing about the story is that it continues by telling us that most people go out into the world each day by way of the door of no intentions – intending neither bad nor good - but when we do so, we invariably return by way of the dark door.
There is certainly some truth to this simple little story. How many times have we gone out into the day not intending anything in particular only to sooner or later run into traffic, coworkers, messages or whatever that rouse us to frustration, anger, fear, doubt, or other negative feelings or actions. According to the story, it is only as we go out into the day through the light door – the door of intending to do good – that we will return by way of the middle door, or, if our intentions are maintained, through the door of good intentions.
The story has a point, but its weakness is clear. We all know that “the road to hell is paved with good intentions” (as first stated by Bernard of Clairvaux), and that of themselves even the best of intentions usually are not enough. Simply put, the door of our own good intentions really only leads to a partial solution to the problem of how our lives will really play out.
But the old story can remind us, of course, of the words of Jesus which carry a much more profound lesson. The Book of John records His words: “I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved and will go in and out and find pasture” (John 10:9). This was part of the parable Jesus told of the sheepfold with the sheep and the door they entered in and out of. But the words fit our old story well, too.
It is only as we go out into the world through the power of Christ – the true door – that our good intentions will be more fully realized and maintained. That takes conscious thought and determination, but if we remind ourselves daily of the door through which we need to walk, we will be much less likely to go out through the door of wrong intentions or that of no intentions at all.
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